By: Walterene Jones
Seven months have passed since I lost my husband and best friend. As I look back, God has been so awesome to me. I truly am blessed beyond human comprehension. The people that God put in my life, my Pastors, my church family, friends and my neighbors are so amazing. No one can ever tell me that there are no good people left in the world anymore because of the outpouring of love that has been shown to me.
During the past seven months, God has held true to his Word that he would provide and take care of me and supply my needs. I didn’t think I could make it, but I’ve made it through Birthdays, Anniversary, Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, car trouble, home repairs and a major Hurricane named Ike. During the storm as I lay in bed trying to sleep but found myself listening to the winds roar outside I prayed “Lord please protect my home and belongings, I just don’t think I could go through another loss right now.” Then the Lord showed me an enormous Angel with its wings all spread out and laying across the roof of my home. When I was finally able to go back home to look around, I saw that a piece of siding at the top under the awning had come off leaving the attic open. Upon walking through my house, I found the wood that covers the portal from the inside of the house into the attic had been sucked out of the hole. I knew the winds had gotten up in my attic, but not even one shingle was missing. God had taken care of my home and belongings.
This week I received word that a long time friend passed away. The last time I saw her was at my husband’s Homegoing Celebration. She was so frail and weak and you could see that Cancer was taking its toll on her, but she was standing strong and believing God. The day of her viewing, I mentally tried to prepare myself to go, but as the time grew closer I found myself crumbling. Once again, my grief overwhelmed me. I kept telling myself, this wasn’t about me, but it was in memory and honor of my friend Doris, but the hurt was so real. I found myself mentally reliving losing my husband again. I was seeing my husband laying in ICU on Life Support and watching him code and the Dr. telling me he was gone.
I know that both my husband and my friend suffered with illness in their bodies for so long and now are laughing, singing, shouting and dancing on the streets of gold with no pain, no illness and no more suffering.
God I believe you to be true to your Word and you have been, but the hurt is still so real and the emptiness is so great. This time of the year is especially hard because he loved Fall so much and always got excited when it arrived. He couldn’t wait until the first real cool snap blew in and was ready to light a fire in the chiminea outside and sit on the swing with a cup of hot cocoa. He loved to take drives to see leaves changing colors, the few we have here in Texas
I miss him so much and I am waiting Lord for that morning when I will wake up and know first hand that “…Joy cometh in the morning.”