Role Models of America

Biting The Dog That Bit You!

Written By: Deborah R.

 

 

Have you heard the expression, “Bite the dog that bit you!”  I suppose it’s an expression of a lesson; as if you’re really going to teach a dog a lesson about biting.  This amuses me.  I can picture it now…a dog takes a bite at you and in response, you bend down and grab the dog’s tail and bite down as hard as you can only to have the dog turn and bite you once more!  How comical our thought life can be.

 

However, in bringing this to a more substantial application in our lives, it’s very true.  Only we don’t “bite” back the way we were bitten.  Let me clarify this.  The bible states that we should turn the other cheek when we are hit on one side.  And, that we should give someone our coat who takes from us.  We are to bless those who do wrong to us.  WHAT?  Bless those who do wrong to us?  That’s crazy!  No, my friends…that’s the love of Christ maturing in our lives.  It’s the tree of the Spirit producing good fruit for all to eat.  It’s taking us to the next level mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

 

I recently “BIT” back and took a big chunk out of my past!  How did I do this?  I’m glad you asked.  This past month my daughter had a big birthday sending her into the infamous TEEN years.  She didn’t want a party, so I decided to throw her a surprise party.  I would invite family and friends.  Hmmm…family.  Well, that’s a hard decision to make as to whom I would actually invite.  Certain family is always invited to these parties and then there is the big one question of…will I invite her grandparents and her dad and step-mom.  Whoa!  Let me take a breath.  You see, I haven’t had a relationship with my parents for about 5 or 6 years because of abuse in my childhood.  And her father…how could I have a relationship with someone I loved dearly that ripped my heart out and left us for a co-worker?  How could I ever do that!?

 

I really had to ask myself some serious questions.  Am I the same person I was back then when those hurts happened?  Am I still holding grudges against those who harmed me?  Am I withholding my relationship with them as a ransom resulting from my hurt?  Have I not grown at all in my Christian walk?  Am I living by the Principles and Steps that “I” teach in Celebrate Recovery?  How do I want my children to react to the hurts in their lives?  I can talk the talk…but am I walking the walk?  The choice is was mine to make.

 

I thought long and hard about these questions.  I wrestled with myself in not wanting to let go of the “power” that I thought I had regarding both issues.  I thought about my children and their feelings.  They both love their grandparents and their dad.  Am I going to add to the difficulties that they will face in life by withholding their grandparents from them or by keeping a relationship with their father at bay?  My son will be graduating this year.  That means graduation party and graduation itself.  I cannot keep the ones he loves from enjoying his accomplishments.  My daughter will be playing sports in middle school and she will want them to come and watch her.  They both need that aspect of their lives fulfilled.

 

So, I invited my ex-husband and his wife and step-daughter.  I invited my mother and dad.  I told myself that if they didn’t come to her party that I wouldn’t invite them to anything ever again.  Boy that shows great love – NOT.  A friend told me that I shouldn’t stop inviting them because that’s their decision.  They have to live with the decisions they make.  Good friends are hard to come by especially if they can gently BANG you over the head and indirectly say GROW-UP!

 

Invitations went out and the party was had.  The grandparents came.  That was a good step forward even though it was a little awkward for both of us.  He dad came but her step-mom didn’t.  I had to prepare myself greatly for the evening.  I was prepared for anything.  The great thing about inviting those of a strained relationship to a gather of this nature is that there are other people you have to mingle with because you are the hostess!  It’s not just a one on one sit down.  The evening went well.  Her dad left early, I’m sure because his wife was not there but my parents stayed until the end of the evening.  Conversation was casual and kept as light as possible.  When the entire guest had left, I took a deep breath of relief and busied myself with cleaning as not to have any other conversations regarding the guest.  Feeling good about the evening and it so surprised my daughter, I relished in those thought until my daughter came into the kitchen with me.  She was talking non-stop and then I heard the tone in her voice become very soft and tender as she said, “Thank you mom for inviting Granny and Papa.”  I told her she was welcomed and she ran to her room looking through her gifts from the night.  As I finished cleaning the kitchen, tears came to my eyes and I knew I did the right thing by inviting everyone that I did.   Those people who made me stretch and grow in new directions made the evening more special and more memorable for my daughter. 

 

How do you bring to a close one event that gave you back the keys of your past?  How do you summarize all of your feelings and emotions and mentally make sense of the situation…only by the Word of God!

 

Matthew 5:3-10 blessed are the poor inspirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.  Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.  Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.  Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.  Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.  Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.  Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.  Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

 

We are in this world but we are not of this world.

My Journey Home - Part 4

by Shirley B.

 

I suppose that in the mind of my sister and I,  we assumed we would just stay where we were, on the farm with great grandma and great grandpa, but we assumed wrong.  In the midst of all the strangers we saw at our father's funeral were his youngest sister and her husband.  I'll call them Mr. and Mrs. A.  They were childless themselves and had decided for their own reasons to take up our father's cause to take custody of my sister and I . So within a very short time, we found ourselves in the old county courthouse, before the judge, in  the middle of the custody trial.  I remember walking into that huge building and looking around. It seemed as if every one we had ever known before was there. There was an aisle down the center of the room that led to the judges seat in the front and center, high and lifted up.It looked as if those on one side were the strangers and people we knew who lived around the old farm area, and on the other side was, of all people , our mother and her current husband, and their friends.  As it turns out, most of these people were here as witnesses for or against her.  She had decided to fight for custody of us.  Why, we wondered?  She obviously didn't want us before and her husband had told her to get rid of us.

It was only later when we got older, that we realized there was money involved.  Whoever had custody of us would get Social Security checks and Veteran's checks every month for each of us, my sister and I, until we turned eighteen. 

 

Our great grandpa took us in and we sat and listened.  It was a long trial and days went by as one by one, the majority came forward to testify against our mother .  In the end, it was decided again, that she was unfit and custody was given to Mr. and Mrs. A.  My sister and I were beginning to get a pretty good idea of what was going on but not what the end results were.  Then the judge called us into his private chambers to question us about our mother and we answered truthfully what we knew of her, not really realizing that we had sealed the case once and for all.  Suddenly, the strangers were in the chambers with us and the judge, and  the uncle who had introduced our father to our mother was there too.  He looked a lot like our father.

Also, there was one other uncle on my father's side of the family.  There was a commotion and scuffling going on out in the hall, and things were getting loud out there.  There was tension in the air all around us.  Our great grandpa, that gentle old man, had pulled out his knife and headed for the judges chambers.  He was going to get my sister and I and take us out of there and back to the farm.  That was his plan, but the police were on him before he could get to us . My sister and I quickly began to listen and put two and two together, and the fight was on.  The first uncle grabbed me up and the other grabbed my sister.  That was it.  We knew!! , and we both began kicking and screaming and fighting and throwing punches as best we could while they literally dragged us out of there to cars that were already waiting for us.  Mr. and Mrs. A. had won, and we were on our way to a place we did not know , to live with people we did not know, and frankly, even though we realized now that they were our father's kin,  we didn't think too highly of them right at this moment.  So as this part of the journey began,  we sat in the back seat of that car and listened to every word  of their conversation intently, and watched  and tried to remember as many landmarks as we could.  First chance we got,  my sister and I decided we were going  back to the farm.  This wasn't the first time we'd made our way home by ourselves, so we thought we could surely do  it again.  Then we heard them say we were all going to stay over in Baton Rouge.  Remember that name.  Where ever that was,  we thought , don't forget that name.

 

 That night in the hotel where we stayed,  we watched as they disgustingly tossed our new dresses and shoes we had worn , into the trash, as if they had fleas or lice or some such thing.

My beautiful yellow dress and red canvas shoes were gone.  The rooms we stayed in opened onto the swimming pool in the center court. It was dark outside and Mr. and Mrs. A. were in bed already , so we decided  to go out to the pool and make our plans.   We had never seen a pool before and in spite of ourselves were a little curious about it.  So we sat there on the edge with our feet in the water and planned our escape, and compared and organized the things and places and landmarks we remembered seeing on the way to this place called Baton Rouge.  We didn't realize they were eavesdropping on us too.  They didn't say anything to us yet.

 

As we finally came into Galveston, Texas,  we realized just what a mighty task we had set for ourselves, but we were determined.  Aha!  We spotted a bus station!! Now all we had to do was remember our way to that bus station and things would be easy from there.  This was the longest journey we had ever taken but at least the two of us were together.  Together we would be alright, no matter what.  My sister had my back and I had hers and though we were very afraid of what was ahead of us,  we were ready , so long as we were together, we could manage. 

 

I remember that everything and everybody was so quiet as they showed us into the house that was to be our new home.  It was late so they showed us the bedroom that would be ours to share, and as they turned to leave, with a  "by the way" type of attitude, they laughingly told us that we could forget about running away,  that no bus station  would agree to take us back to Mississippi without being paid in advance. Money?  Well, we sure didn't have any of that!

 

Mr. and Mrs. A  tried at first.  I have to admit that, but it didn't last long.  My sister and I were tested to see what grade we should go into.  I went to second grade and she went to third.  We had retained more than we realized in our hit and miss education.  Mrs. A took us to have clothes made for each of us.  Yes, they were very wealthy it seems.  However, in her eyes , my sister and I looked enough alike , she thought she would dress us like twins.  What was she thinking??  The things I remember most about those first months in that strange place, was the parade of  people who came and went in that house.  It turned out that they were members of a huge Baptist church in town and Mrs. A. made very sure that all the "church ladies" and such, knew of the good deed she was doing.  Mrs. A. would dress us up.  We cleaned up pretty well on the outside, but then she'd tell us to go sit in the chairs on the side of the room and keep our mouths shut!   It was true that we sounded like we came right out of the backwoods of Mississippi, which we did,  but somehow,  Mrs. A. was getting frustrated with us that she couldn't get the accent and the slang out of our vocabulary.  We were still very rough around the edges.  Mostly ladies, would just come and stare at us while conversations went on in hushed voices.  It was one of the most rude and unkind things to do to two little girls who had just lost so much.

 

And that brings me to the second thing I remember of those earlier days there.  Something that never changed over the years .  Even though our father was Mrs. A.'s  brother,  we never heard them mention his name, especially not to my sister and I.  There was a very real yearning in our hearts , when our grief was so fresh and real over his death,  to talk about him.  We wanted to hear all there was to know about him.  We didn't want to forget him, this dad who we hadn't even seen for so long.  We wanted to remember how he looked., to see pictures of him so that his face wouldn't fade from our memories.  However,  we received none of these things .  It was like he never existed , as far as they were concerned.  So my sister and I kept the memory alive in our own way.

 

All was not well or peaceful in this new and strange place.........

Psalm 34:  18  tells me..

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those who are crushed in spirit.

 

It was a fine line my sister and I walked, between hope and despair. 

 

1 Peter 5:  10  tells me...

In his kindness, God called you to his eternal glory by means of Jesus Christ.  After you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.

 

My sister and I surely needed that firm foundation.  Ours seemed to be constantly crumbling beneath our feet.  There was a song that was very popular in Mississippi during those days when my father died.  My aunt use to sing it sometimes as she played her guitar.  The words were seared into our minds, because it went like this:

 

                 "How Far is Heaven?"

A little girl was waiting for her daddy one day,

It was time to meet him,

When she heard her mommy say...

Come to mommy darling

Please do not cry,

Cause daddy's gone to heaven,

Way up in the sky.

 

How far is heaven?

When can I go?

To see my daddy,

He's there I know.

How far is heaven?

Let's go tonight.

I want my daddy,

To hold me tight.

 

 

There must be more words to this song , but after I left Mississippi, I never heard this song again, until  almost 35 years later.  God used this song to give me hope, that my father was indeed in heaven and someday, I will see him again.

To be continued...............

 

CANCER BASICS - Article Excerpt from the Idaho Observer

View entire article at this link:
http://proliberty.com/observer/20050403.htm

"Acidosis" is the scientific term for a body that has become acidic— or has fallen below a pH of 7.0. In this state, the body’s system is deprived of oxygen causing you to be more susceptible to colds, flus and more serious diseases/infections; you also age at an accelerated rate.

Our modern lives give us ample opportunity to become acidic. Commonly-consumed acid-forming foods and beverages include meat, dairy products, sugar, coffee and alcohol. Environmental exposure to solvents, herbicides, pesticides and other chemical toxins boost our tendency to become acidic.

Acidosis is the cause of America’s #2 killer — cancer. In order to understand the basics of cancer, we must first understand the acid/alkaline balance. In understanding the acid/alkaline balance, the following summary makes perfect sense: The prime cause of cancer is the replacement of the respiration of oxygen in normal body cells by a fermentation of sugar.

Over 75 years ago, Dr. Otto Warburg was awarded two Nobel prizes for demonstrating that cancer results when weakened cell respiration occurs due to lack of oxygen at the cellular level. According to Warburg, damaged cell respiration causes fermentation, resulting in low pH at the cellular level.

Dr. Warburg, in his Nobel Prize winning papers, described the environment of the cancer cell: A normal healthy cell undergoes an adverse change when it can no longer take in oxygen to convert glucose into energy. In the absence of oxygen, the cell reverts to a primal nutritional program to nourish itself by converting glucose through the process of fermentation. The lactic acid produced by fermentation lowers the cell pH and destroys the ability of DNA and RNA to control cell division. The cancer cells then begin to multiply without restraint.

The lactic acid simultaneously causes severe local pain as it destroys cell enzymes; the cancer appears as a rapidly-growing external cell covering with a core of dead cells. We know cell masses of this description as "tumors."

Subsequent research by Keith Brewer, Ph.D and H.E. Satori has shown that cancer cannot exist when the body’s pH is raised to 8.0.

Dr. Brewer developed a protocol to therapeutically raise pH with the element cesium in conjunction with potassium.

God made the perfect body—and then we spend the rest of our lives starving it of the elements our cells need to function properly.

Doctors Otto Warburg and Linus Pauling won Nobel prizes in chemistry for identifying the true causes of diseases such as cancer at the molecular level—and what can be done to reverse the symptoms. The process is the opposite of complicated: It’s elemental. And, unlike the drugs, radiation treatments and surgeries bankrupting Americans today, many people diagnosed as terminal are reporting a reversal of their chronic symptoms after a few weeks for under $100.

You can do your own research by studying the work of doctors Warburg, Pauling, Keith Brewer, Fred Klenner and Irwin Stone.

Note: A group of chronic disease survivors formed Advanced Scientific Health (ASH) to help people understand how their bodies become ill and how to heal them nutritionally. To support the cause, compounding pharmacists are making the elements of orthomolecular nutrition available to ASH members at lab cost. The Idaho Observer, in conjunction with ASH, will publish a guide to orthomolecular nutrition by May 1, 2005. Call The Idaho Observer for more information
The Idaho Observer - P.O. Box 457 - Spirit Lake, Idaho 83869 - Phone: 208-255-2307

Click Here to Download Free Research Information and Free Audios
"Scientific Information That You May Not Be Able to Live Without"

Learn more about Advanced Scientific Health at:
The pH Advantage

DISCLAIMER - The information on this Blog is provided for educational and informational purposes only we are not attempting to prescribe, treat, or recommend and in no way is the information contained on this site intended to be a substitute for a health care provider's consultation. If you are ill please consult your own physician or appropriate health care provide

View entire article at this link:
http://proliberty.com/observer/20050403.htm

"Acidosis" is the scientific term for a body that has become acidic— or has fallen below a pH of 7.0. In this state, the body’s system is deprived of oxygen causing you to be more susceptible to colds, flus and more serious diseases/infections; you also age at an accelerated rate.

Our modern lives give us ample opportunity to become acidic. Commonly-consumed acid-forming foods and beverages include meat, dairy products, sugar, coffee and alcohol. Environmental exposure to solvents, herbicides, pesticides and other chemical toxins boost our tendency to become acidic.

Acidosis is the cause of America’s #2 killer — cancer. In order to understand the basics of cancer, we must first understand the acid/alkaline balance. In understanding the acid/alkaline balance, the following summary makes perfect sense: The prime cause of cancer is the replacement of the respiration of oxygen in normal body cells by a fermentation of sugar.

Over 75 years ago, Dr. Otto Warburg was awarded two Nobel prizes for demonstrating that cancer results when weakened cell respiration occurs due to lack of oxygen at the cellular level. According to Warburg, damaged cell respiration causes fermentation, resulting in low pH at the cellular level.

Dr. Warburg, in his Nobel Prize winning papers, described the environment of the cancer cell: A normal healthy cell undergoes an adverse change when it can no longer take in oxygen to convert glucose into energy. In the absence of oxygen, the cell reverts to a primal nutritional program to nourish itself by converting glucose through the process of fermentation. The lactic acid produced by fermentation lowers the cell pH and destroys the ability of DNA and RNA to control cell division. The cancer cells then begin to multiply without restraint.

The lactic acid simultaneously causes severe local pain as it destroys cell enzymes; the cancer appears as a rapidly-growing external cell covering with a core of dead cells. We know cell masses of this description as "tumors."

Subsequent research by Keith Brewer, Ph.D and H.E. Satori has shown that cancer cannot exist when the body’s pH is raised to 8.0.

Dr. Brewer developed a protocol to therapeutically raise pH with the element cesium in conjunction with potassium.

God made the perfect body—and then we spend the rest of our lives starving it of the elements our cells need to function properly.

Doctors Otto Warburg and Linus Pauling won Nobel prizes in chemistry for identifying the true causes of diseases such as cancer at the molecular level—and what can be done to reverse the symptoms. The process is the opposite of complicated: It’s elemental. And, unlike the drugs, radiation treatments and surgeries bankrupting Americans today, many people diagnosed as terminal are reporting a reversal of their chronic symptoms after a few weeks for under $100.

You can do your own research by studying the work of doctors Warburg, Pauling, Keith Brewer, Fred Klenner and Irwin Stone.

Note: A group of chronic disease survivors formed Advanced Scientific Health (ASH) to help people understand how their bodies become ill and how to heal them nutritionally. To support the cause, compounding pharmacists are making the elements of orthomolecular nutrition available to ASH members at lab cost. The Idaho Observer, in conjunction with ASH, will publish a guide to orthomolecular nutrition by May 1, 2005. Call The Idaho Observer for more information
The Idaho Observer - P.O. Box 457 - Spirit Lake, Idaho 83869 - Phone: 208-255-2307

Click Here to Download Free Research Information and Free Audios
"Scientific Information That You May Not Be Able to Live Without"

Learn more about Advanced Scientific Health at:
The pH Advantage

DISCLAIMER - The information on this Blog is provided for educational and informational purposes only we are not attempting to prescribe, treat, or recommend and in no way is the information contained on this site intended to be a substitute for a health care provider's consultation. If you are ill please consult your own physician or appropriate health care provide

Vitamin Tips

Do you have a hard time taking your vitamins because of all of the bottles and jars that you have to keep up with. Or having a hard time finding a place to keep them someplace that's not unsightly, or unsafe for kids to be around.  Here's the routine .... pen the lids ....get one out..... screw the lids back on.... Open the next bottle...... get one out.... screw the lid back on......  day by day by day.  I know it gets  old.  Well here's your solution - this looks better, and it's easier to open one bottle or two then 10!

Get 2 Vitamin Dispensers and  downsize all your bottles into these- and voila... 12 babies everyday - without the hassles, down your throat in no time!

Go ahead ..... you know you need to be taking them .... your body will certainly thank you!   

Healthy Slimming Tips

I just read a good blog post from Raylen from master cleanse secrets.

She shares some easy tips slimming down as quickly as
possible. A blog post that shows you 7 things you can start
doing today to slim down.

Some of these are so simple you might not believe they could work,
but a few small changes can equal some astonishing results.

You just receive the invitation to your family reunion and found
out it will be professionally filmed and photographed-and earlier
this morning the scale informed you're a few pounds away from your
ideal weight.

Don't panic, because there are some quick ways to drop the weight
and bring you closer to the real you. In fact, you don't have to
jump rope like you're on Rocky audition, and you won't have to
visit a surgeon to have your stomach stapled. In fact you can lose
as much as a pound a day by simply modifying your current lifestyle
habits. Here's how:

    * Halve-it: This is simple science, if you are only eating half
of the calories you normally consume, you will lose weight. Portion
control is one of the best ways to shed weight quickly. Do not
change what you eat; just eat exactly half of what you would
normally eat for lunch and dinner. For breakfast, eat a full, but
well balanced meal before 9:30am, to ensure that you can burn it
all off.

    * Practice the Cinderella-Carb Rule: Avoid eating carbs after
12:00pm (noon). Increase your level of vegetables and proteins for
lunch and dinner. You can keep the pancakes; just make sure they're
in the morning. This will ensure you have enough energy throughout
the day but also gain the benefits of losing weight.

    * Make better choices: OK, fried chicken is finger-licking
good, but so is a baked chicken breast and it has fewer calories.
Eat the foods you like, but eat them from cooking methods that are
healthier. Steamed, baked, poached and pan-seared are all better
methods than fried (and remember to halve it). Substituting whole
milk to skim milk in your cups of coffee can shave off hundreds of
calories.

    * Snack Switch: If you sneak snacks, replace all candies and
pastries with pieces of fruit or nut butters (like almond or peanut
butter). Oranges, bananas are also full of the sugar your body
wants, but it also has vitamins and nutrients and far less empty
calories. Even better are some vegetables which are tasty and
filling like cucumbers and carrots. Have as many of those that you
want. Drinking water to fill your stomach up is a great trick to
getting rid of hunger pains; it's a well known trick that
professional models use.

    * Take the Long Way: Find ways to increase your walking. Park in
the furthest place possible at your work parking lot and walk. When
you have breaks, walk somewhere, any where. Take stairs when you
can. For lunch, go to a mall, eat your meal at the food court and
spend twenty minutes walking. You don't even have to sweat...just
walk. These tiny expenditures of calories are like ATM fees, they
eventually add up-but this time in your favor!

     * Sweat it out: If you belong to a gym, use the steam room and
sauna. Sweating burns an amazing amount of calories and keeps your
metabolism in fifth gear long after after your sweat. The other
perk is that sweating is great for the skin.

If you can practice these tips for two weeks, you should be able to
shed at least 10 pounds off of your body.

You can get more tips like these from her master cleanse secrets site. Click here.

Words of Wisdom to Ponder Today

Having experienced this loss, and the waves of grief that attack the soul relentlessly - what can you say you have learned in wisdom.  Someone once said this statement that I leave with you today........

We don't receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us or spare us.

Marcel Proust

Have you taken time today to be still and allow Father God to hold you closely and deeply in His Arms. His wisdom is abundant and His Comfort complete in your sorrow.

He said...

Come to Me all ye who labor and are heavy laden .... and I will give you rest.

My Journey Home Part 3

Heathens!! That's what our great grandmother called my sister and I, and I don't think she meant it too kindly.  Of course, she could have been referring to the Indian side of our ancestry, but somehow I think she's was talking about the fact that we were just plain wild and undisciplined.  No one had taken the time to give us any guidance concerning our behavior, and we had never been in one place long enough to get any schooling.  My sister went to school for a short time when we were in Texas , during the recovery from my accident. But me?  No, I hadn't gone to school yet, but I was about to and my sister and I were about to learn about the board of education on our behinds. 

Let me describe my great grandmother to you.  She was a small woman who wore the old prairie bonnets, long dresses with long aprons and big pockets, with work boots.  She was as tough as the day was long, but oh how we came to love her!  The farm had no running water, only a well, no electricity or any modern conveniences, and the outhouse was at the back of the pasture.  My great grandmother and great grandfather raised their own garden and their own cows.  They milked, and churned butter, canned their own foods, and did their own sewing. Everything!, and my sister and I thought we had landed in paradise!

 

However, we were about to get a crash course in the rules of the farm.  Great grandmother's main rule was that breakfast was served at the crack of dawn and supper came when the sun went down.  If you missed either one, too bad for you.  The kitchen was closed!  Her next rule was:  " You little heathens stay out of my hen house!"  If we violated that one, which we couldn't resist every once in a while, the consequences from her were bad. 

 

Now my great grandfather, he was another story completely.  Every day would find him in his overalls and boots , going out to do whatever was needed on the farm for that day.  He was an old softie , as gentle as granny was tough.  My sister and I spent that short year or so wandering the backwoods pines of that old farm, picking flowers, and setting trails to the other farms in the area.  We would rise up in the mornings, put on the shorts that granny made from the cloth flour sacks that she saved, and off to the woods we'd go, usually until it began getting dark. If great grandfather was around , he'd stand us underneath the pump in the yard to wash off all the dirt of the forest  and then he'd feed us..If  we came in late, many a time my sister and I sat at that old hand crafted table in the kitchen while he fired up the wood stove and cooked our favorite, slices of fried sweet potato. Life was good for a while.   It was the happiest of times for us. 

 

On the days we knew it was Sunday, at times my sister and I would take the trail through the woods and up the hill to the little old church there and listen to beautiful music coming from inside.  It was there that we learned that old song,:  Do Lord , oh , Do Lord, Do remember me.  This little song was one that my sister and I used many , many, times in the years ahead to lift our spirits when we felt sad and helpless. 

 

We had learned to listen to what the adults around us were saying.  We eavesdropped on all conversations.  It was a habit we had gotten into because we never knew when our circumstances would change and we wouldn't have any warning at all.  So we listened.  We'd hide under the porch outside in the evenings when granny and great grandpa would be rocking and talking about their day and we'd listen.  Granny dipped snuff, and there were times that she'd spit, SPLAT! aiming at the cracks between the boards on the porch floor, and it'd land right in the top of  our head.  We wondered if she knew we were under the porch there.  

 

Sometimes, when all the work was done,  neighbors would come in the evening .  My aunt would bring out her guitar,  someone else the fiddle, another the harmonica and the spoons.., and music would fill the air!!  We didn't really mind the switchings.  We were learning to behave ourselves a little better and even after it was over, we knew that granny loved us anyway.  We were happy . There were times when it was cool and the sun went down, that great grandpa would fire up the fireplace and granny would sit in her rocker there in front of it and my sister and I would help her take down her long, long hair that braided and coiled underneath that old bonnet.  We loved to brush it and watch it lay on the floor at the bottom.  All the years and colors of her life were right there in all that hair as it faded from the jet black of her youth into the grays and white of her old age.  Yes, this was the best of life for my sister and I.

 

However, change was in the air again.

It was towards the end of that year when we learned that our father had been released from prison.  The courts had given him custody of my sister and I, and he had gone back to Texas to get a job and arrange for a house so he could come back to Mississippi and pick up my sister and I.  We were so excited.   It was decided that my sister and I should each have a brand new store bought dress and new shoes for this grand occasion.  I chose a yellow dress with red canvas sailor shoes with red and white stripes on the toes.  Gorgeous!  Great grandma and great grandpa were happy for us but sad also because we would be going.  However, they had never had anything but good to say about our father.  They liked him.  He was a good and kind man with a wonderful sense of humor.  They also knew the circumstances of his imprisonment.

 

The day finally arrived and there was so much anticipation on our part as we waited to see the dad that we loved so much but hadn't seen in over two years.   I think most everyone has experienced a time in their lives when you feel the very air around you change and you just know that something is about to happen.  This was one of those moments.  I felt it and my sister felt it.  So we listened. 

 

We tiptoed to the front room where granny and grandpa were sitting in front of the fireplace and peeked around the doorframe to see, part of us hoping it was just that our dad had arrived.  Then we heard granny ask grandpa,  " How are we gonna tells them girls that their daddy's not coming?"  "How are we gonna tell them that he's dead?" 

 

At that point, my sister and I just lost it.  We screamed and cried and ran into the room,  not caring that they knew we had been eavesdropping .  Through their own tears they told us how our father had been on his way to Mississippi with his friend to pick us up and an 18 wheeler had veered into their lane .  Our father was dead.  That July summer I turned seven,  later in September my sister turned nine  and  that October,  our father died.  Instead of wearing our new dresses to a celebration, we wore them to our father's funeral.  We were numb , I guess is about the best way to describe it.  We were cried empty.  As my sister and I stood before our daddy's coffin, I remember thinking and asking my sister how they got daddy into that little box.  He was too tall to fit in there.  I just knew it.  He looked so peaceful in sleep but that wonderful smile we both knew, was not there . 

 

In our happiness on the farm, I think we had let our guard down some and when this blow came,  we weren't ready for it.   We didn't have much time to get ourselves ready for the fight that was about to come.  I believe in my heart that's why God kept my sister and I together through all these things.  We could eventually lift each other up  some way.  Do Lord , oh Do Lord, do remember me..............

 

ISAIAH 43: 2  tells me:

When thou passest through the waters, I WILL BE with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.

 

What a blessing it would have been to understand this Word then, because that's how we felt .

We felt overwhelmed.  The Lord has showed me now, that He was with us even then.  My God is Sovereign.  He was not caught by surprise as my sister and I were.

 

PSALM 10:14

You have seen it; yes, you have taken note of trouble and grief and placed them under your control.  The victim entrusts himself to you.  You alone have been the helper of orphans.

 

We were sure going to need that help in the months and years yet to come.

To be continued.........

by Shirley B.

 

Ecclesiastes 6:14:

A faithful friend is a strong defense: and he that hath found such an one hath found a treasure.

Every woman wants a true friend.  But finding such a friend can be a lifelong pursuit.  Females search among many  women- making mistakes of her trust and treasures along the way. "Oops"' she says to herself - "I don't think we are on the same page here - better move on".  And so she does, sometimes to no hurt on both sides, sometimes with plenty hurt equally.

Still some are more affected by it, than others, based on their personality types.  The Sanguine woman is a people person and she needs the support and friendship of many friends fo laugh and cry with.  The Melancholy woman not so much, she is focused inwardly and analyzes all her conversations doubting herself and others motives.  The  Choleric woman is a strong leader who needs friends to bounce ideas off of. The Phlegmatic woman is a loyal and true friend often of the other types of personalities. Once made a friend - they stay a friend, 

In my life I have found many friends that were brought into my life for seasons - not for life.  Some remain in my heart and are remembered fondly, as life and circumstances caused our paths to grow apart,  Others it's with pain when I think of them, for their actions towards me were unjust and betraying. I personally have found a handful of friends in my lifetime. And not all of them are for the same reasons.  Some are in the same line of work as I am, my peers,  Others are at church and we do ministry together well. Then there are personal friends to mention - that have nothing to do with work - just good to be with during life's ebbs and flows.  

I have tried to be friends with women who snubbed me, or ignored my tentative reaching hand to them,  And on several occasions I have had special planned events and invited  women to attend - which they did for several years in a row.  But all to no avail - they never called, or reached back for me.  So I stopped trying - it was pointless in this particular group.  And so I know about trying to find good friends. And sometimes family members are not the right choice for a good friendship either.  Too many other issues   

But the  heart of a woman continues to look for a friend to share good and bad with.  So..... how to find one?

1.Ask God to be your friend.  And then be aware when He is! 

2. Be open to new women you are introduced to. Don't ignore them - they might prove to be the best friend ever!

3. Be a friend  to those who are around your life right now.  Start where you are - not with empty words and cards, but with actions.  Then see how they respond back to you.  It might be a mutual connection. 

4. Stay true to your character - it's the most important part of finding the right kind of friend.

Your friend.....

Gayla Holley

What is an eating disorder?

See that girl who is super thin?  How can she be sooooo thin and tiny.  I mean what on earth does she do for food?  Ever wondered that? Here's some answers from Wikipedia.

An eating disorder is a compulsion to eat, or avoid eating, that negatively affects both one's physical and mental health.

Eating disorders are all encompassing. They affect every part of the person's life. According to the authors of Surviving an Eating Disorder, "feelings about work, school, relationships, day-to-day activities and one's experience of emotional well being are determined by what has or has not been eaten or by a number on a scale."

Anorexia nervosaand bulimia nervosaare the most common eating disorders generally recognized by medical classification schemes,with a significant diagnostic overlap between the two.

Together, they affect an estimated 5-7% of females in the United States during their lifetimes. There is a third type of eating disorder currently being investigated and defined - Binge Eating Disorder. This is a chronic condition that occurs when an individual consumes huge amounts of food during a brief period of time and feels totally out of control and unable to stop their eating. It can lead to serious health conditions such as morbid obesity, diabetes, hypertension, and cardiovascular disease.^.

^{It's a serious issue - watch out for your daughters!}

 

Domestic violence is never ok in a marriage.  You already know this, and you know what it is doing to you. I know you have searched your heart to find out what you are doing to cause this.  Did you solve it? 

What is causing this to happen? I hear your heart crying out this question.

Sometimes it's drug related..... is he on drugs?

 Alcohol can also  trigger it to start happening .... is there alcohol in your life? And what about his? Once done, this becomes a habit and a form of reaction.

Is it the result of childhood trauma?  Was he physically abused as a child and so has continued the damaging form of abuse in his adulthood? 

Is it  the result of control issues?  He is angry and wants to control the situation so the only way he knows  how to is with violence.

Still others use it as a way of reacting to anger.  It's a sick  form of release.  Is this it? 

There are others, but these are the usual violence triggers.  Is this happening to you?  Don't' wait... why wait?  Wait until what?  Wait until it happens again?  Go talk to someone today! Start changing your life right now!